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Created Feb 11, 2009 05:51PM PST • Edited Feb 11, 2009 05:51PM PST

1. Quality

2. Summary

   Good 3.0

   Jurassic Park is most memorable for its groundbreaking special effects. It was not the first film to use computer-generated imaging, not by a long shot, but it was the first to take the bold step of using CGI, not stop-motion, to create life-like animals. It was very successful in this area; the special effects still hold up (mostly) today. However, even with this powerful new toy, the masterminds of this movie were wise not to overdo the special effects. Instead, different scenes of robotics, CGI, and some clever techniques (the vibrating water in the cup, for example) combine to give the illusion that there really were dinosaurs on that island.

   Plot? A movie this big doesn’t need a very deep plot, but the one in Jurassic Park is decent enough to make for an engaging thriller. Using a new cloning technique and some shady business skills, the eccentric John Hammond (Richard Attenborough) plans to open a theme park in a Costa Rican tropical island, with live dinosaurs as the main attraction… a guaranteed cash cow. But there’s one flaw in his plan: nothing works the way it should. This becomes shockingly evident when a mishap at one of the pens results in one of his workers being eaten alive. Hoping to assure his worried investors that nothing is “really” wrong, Hammond persuades several experts into visiting the island to inspect it and come up with their own conclusions. It is during this visit that the worst break-down occurs, and the survivors find that they must get things back online so they can contact the mainland for help.

4. Acting

   Very Good 3.5

   The cast here is impeccable. Sam Neill is perfect as the soft-spoken paleontologist turned action hero, Laura Dern plays her action scenes with authentic desperation, and Jeff Goldblum will make you wonder if he really is reading off memorized lines. Even the kids (Joseph Mazzello and Ariana Richards) aren’t as bad as they could be.

5. Male Stars Really Great 4.5

6. Female Stars Very Good 3.5

7. Female Costars Pretty Bad 1.5

8. Male Costars Good 3.0

10. Film

    Good 3.0

    How did Jaws hold the tension and suspense? Because Spielberg held off showing the shark until halfway through the film (partly because the damn thing wouldn’t work). The opening scene with the girl being dragged all over the water and slamming her into a buoy was scary as hell because you couldn’t see the shark. I saw tha forever ago and I remember it to this day! All you saw was the girl being ripped to shreds! IMO, that was the scariest scene in the movie! Tell me, when you went swimming in the ocean, didn’t it bother you that you couldn’t see what was swimming around your feet, just like the girl couldn’t?

    The same goes for JP. If Spielberg were smart, he would have held off showing the dinosaurs until the T-Rex attack. Can you imagine how scary and cool that would have been if you hadn’t seen the creatures, and almost halfway through the movie, you’re sitting there in the dark theater, you hear the approaching booming footsteps of the T-Rex and then ROAR, there it is! The first dinosaur that you see is the one that will rip you to pieces, instead of the cute, “oooh, look at the dinosaur” scene that was in the first 15 minutes of the movie?

11. Direction Really Great 4.5

    Steven Speilberg is the best director.

12. Play Barely OK 2.0

13. Music Bad 1.0

14. Visuals Very Good 3.5
15. Content

16. Edge

    Tame 1.4

    PG-13 for Violence that isn’t shown.

17. Sex Innocent 1.2

    They talk about “Having Kids”

18. Violence Fierce 1.8

    WARNING: The T-Rex may scare 2 year olds.

19. Rudeness Polite 1.2

    Some low-profile language.

21. Reality

    Surreal 3.0

    I’d like to see this sometime.

22. Circumstantial Supernatural 3.4

23. Biological Surreal 2.3

24. Physical Fantasy 4.5