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transcendmatter's Review

Created Oct 05, 2008 05:00AM PST • Edited Oct 05, 2008 05:00AM PST

  1. Quality
  2. Good 3.0

    Eagle Eye is well produced, competently acted, and highly entertaining. Unfortunately, it’s also one of the most retarded movies I’ve ever seen… For those unfamiliar with the plot: Eagle Eye follows the (mis)adventures of a twin and a single mom called out-of-the-blue by a mechanically cold female voice, telling them that they have been “activated”, and instructed to do crazy things like jump off buildings, drive into robot-controlled junkyards and board japanese charter buses, or their lives and the lives of those close to them will become forfeit. From there it only convolutes further…

    I must say though, the first big chase sequence they embark on is pretty amazing in its awesome unbelievability. After that one, as Shia says, you believe crazy voice lady could turn a train into a talking duck. Unfortunately, her plans do not involve Daffy, Donald or Howard…

    There’s nothing much more frustrating than being 2 minutes ahead of the plot, which is where I found myself stationed throughout the film. It went places I didn’t see coming from the outset, but was still somehow never surprising. It’s still an enjoyable, disposable piece of post-summer fluff, from people with more talent than they display here (I’m looking at you, DJ Caruso…)

  3. Good 3.0

    Serviceable. Boo-yah…

  4. Male Stars Good 3.0
  5. Female Stars Good 3.0
  6. Female Costars Good 3.0
  7. Male Costars Good 3.0
  8. Great 4.0

    It’s a really great looking movie, actually. The production design for both Crazy Voice and the way she “sees” was really cool and fun to watch. The soundtrack sounds like it escaped a Michael Bay movie, but it suits the film just fine.

  9. Direction Great 4.0
  10. Play Great 4.0
  11. Music Great 4.0
  12. Visuals Great 4.0
  13. Content
  14. Tame 1.5

    Did they even swear? I can’t remember…

  15. Sex Innocent 1.5
  16. Violence Gentle 1.5
  17. Rudeness Polite 1.5
  18. Fantasy 4.2

    It’s pretty far outside the realm of believability, but it’s presented in a believable way. Thus is the charm of Eagle Eye…

  19. Circumstantial Fantasy 4.2
  20. Biological Fantasy 4.2
  21. Physical Fantasy 4.2

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