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Created May 16, 2014 08:14PM PST • Edited May 16, 2024 10:34PM PST

1. Quality

2. Summary

   Very Good 3.5

   High concept meets high ass in Neighbors. Adolescent studs move in next door to immature new parents. Hijinks ensue, with lots of laughs, LOLs even. However, pervasive grossness keeps Seth Rogen & Nicholas Stoller’s movie from greatness, even by the standards of hard-R comedies. F’ing Sarah Marshall it’s not.

   Remarkably devoid of groaners, it is however overpopulated with assholes, the kind of party-before-everything dudes and babes that are fun in small doses, but wear out their welcome over time. That’s what happens over 90 minutes of Neighbors. The main characters are so obnoxious that even though they’re funny as hell, legitimate disgust keeps complete enjoyment at bay.

   Not that there’s not a dozen knee-slapping bits, recognizable to anyone who enjoyed an indestructible youth, college especially, in a fraternity house ideally; or has been a new parent. Both sound familiar to me.

   Rose Byrne = Fantasy Wife

   • Hotter than her hubby
   • Swears like a sailor
   • Parties like a rockstar
   • Mothers like a Madonna

   Zac Efron & Dave Franco are the Jagger & Richards of fraternity brothers, President & Vice President of the hottest house on campus. Efron should be recognized as a weapon of mass female arousal. His wingman Franco – a natural at entitled masculinity – demonstrates a dick that rises on cue. Teddy & Pete, BMOC

   Bottom Line

   Neighbors is a worthy successor to FSM and Get Him to the Greek, even if it doesn’t reach the same orbit.

4. Acting

   Great 4.0

   Seth Rogen gets to canoodle with a very game Rose Byrne, making him one helluva lucky movie husband. She’s nursing, so her enlarged boobs are primary plot devices. Oops, is that OK, calling boobs plot devices?

   Byrne – from Sydney – gets to speak in her native Aussie voice as the exchange student who stayed. She’s very pretty, very funny and very tolerant. Stoller cast her as the rockstar’s girlfriend in his perfect Greek. The can’t-miss-comedy-director was wise to cast her again as Rogen’s fantasy wife. More please.

   Rogen gets away with more shit and barely becomes an asshole doing it. His boyish man in Neighbors is simply a quintessential Rogen role. Elise & Zoey Vargas are the twins who play their baby.

   Zac Efron’s handsome fraternity President is straight from central casting. It’s a great role for Efron, really great. Not quite adult, but doing very adult things, meaning the one time High School star is ready to graduate to real adult fare. Not to overlook his Teddy Sanders, to which he brings comedic timing and ample charm to go along with his killer looks. Put it this way, he’s working the door at Abercrombie & Fitch at the end of the movie. He’s overqualified in the looks department, yet you don’t hate him either.

   Dave Franco – James Franco’s younger, better looking brother – could be a bigger star than his Big Bro.

   The disappointing supporting cast includes Brian Huskey, Ike Barinholtz, Carla Gallo, Halston Sage, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Jerrod Carmichael and Craig Roberts as Assjuice.

5. Male Stars Really Great 4.5

6. Female Stars Really Great 4.5

7. Female Costars Very Good 3.5

8. Male Costars Very Good 3.5

10. Film

    Very Good 3.5

    Nicholas Stoller’s film is pretty consistently off-the-hook. The laughs get off-the-hook too, though not as much as with Get Him to the Greek or Forgetting Sarah Marshall. Greek was too funny to be comedy-drama. This one is a comedy-drama, clocking in at roughly 25% LOL funny.

    Horribly irresponsible, deals in extreme stereotypes.

    • Young parents who still want to go to raves.
    • Fraternity brothers who peg the party-hardy meter

11. Direction Great 4.0

12. Play Good 3.0

13. Music Great 4.0

14. Visuals Great 4.0
15. Content

16. Edge

    Sordid 2.8

    Enthusiastically off-the-hook, intoxicant-wise especially.

    Not recommended for those with Dormaphobia: i.e., fear of bad things college kids may do.

    As for the Arrested Development parents, the need for Child Protective Services comes to mind.

17. Sex Erotic 2.7

18. Violence Fierce 1.8

19. Rudeness Nasty 4.0

21. Reality

    Surreal 2.5

    Highly surreal circumstantially, Neighbors nonetheless presents a panoply of recognizable behaviors, especially of crazy college stuff and silly parenting stuff. That’s what makes it funny.

22. Circumstantial Surreal 3.0

23. Biological Supernatural 3.1

24. Physical Glib 1.5