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BrianSez's Review

Created Sep 08, 2012 08:39AM PST • Edited Sep 08, 2012 08:39AM PST

  1. Quality
  2. OK 2.5

    Taylor Kitsch is John Carter, a civil war era yankee and indian fighter transplanted to Mars only to find himself in another fight. A fight for a hot woman and against bad guys bent on destroying the planet. This was a hodge-podge of a movie that tries to borrow from every Sci Fi film you’ve ever seen. Most notably the star wars saga. Ok, the 1800’s earth angle was mildly unique, but this movie mixes up so much stuff, that it just ends up being a confusing mess.

  3. OK 2.5

    Taylor Kitsch gives it a decent go. As an irreverent tough guy persona, he fits reasonably well. But he really picked a bad film to make his blockbuster debut.

    Lyn Collins is a bit better than simple eye candy, but just a bit.

    Willem Dafoe is unrecognizable as one of the aliens that befriends John Carter

  4. Male Stars OK 2.5
  5. Female Stars OK 2.5
  6. Female Costars OK 2.5
  7. Male Costars OK 2.5
  8. OK 2.5

    Too much going on!

  9. Direction OK 2.5
  10. Play OK 2.5
  11. Music OK 2.5
  12. Visuals OK 2.5
  13. Content
  14. Risqué 1.6
  15. Sex Innocent 1.5
  16. Violence Fierce 1.8
  17. Rudeness Polite 1.5
  18. Fantasy 4.6
  19. Circumstantial Fantasy 4.6
  20. Biological Fantasy 4.6
  21. Physical Fantasy 4.6

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May 5, 2013 8:00PM
BrettHarrison

Regarding BrettHarrison’s Review
It baffles the mind when these big companies act like first year Wharton students. Like they’re just learning about business.

May 5, 2013 7:55PM
Wick

Regarding BrettHarrison’s Review
Helpful review Brett. Makes me interested in seeing it, but both iTunes and Amazon are only selling it, not renting. Nor does Netflix offer it streaming. You’d think Disney would have learned their lesson at the box office. Guess not.