MovieSorter

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Pirates of the ...
Barely OK 77 Points 2011

Slog-a-thon. Johnny Depp, great costars, fabulous visuals: all for naught. The fourth installment of Disney’s thrill ride franchise reinforces much, mostly that more is not more when it’s a mess.

A convoluted plot about the search for the Fountain of Youth scaffolds countless action sequence…

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WikChip Image Tempestuous beauty fails to catch fir...
2 Replies
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No Time To Die
Barely OK 66 Points 2021

James Bond is dead, literally and figuratively. Daniel Craig resurrected him better than any actor ever, but has now acquiesced to character suicide in the depressing and desultory No Time To Die. Sorry for the plot spoiler, but a lifetime of rushing to see James Bond movies is now yet one more…

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WikChip Image Ana de Armas dazzled, thankfully
Ocean's Eight
Barely OK 83 Points 2018

Ocean’s 8 looked to be an upgrade over the played-out George Clooney – Matt Damon super caper series. Sandra Bullock and a never sexier Cate Blanchett hold up their end, only to be let down by a script that’s more flat spumante than bubbly Dom Pérignon. My theater twittered on occasion but neve…

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WikChip Video Next time, do better.
Minions
Pretty Bad 66 Points 2015

Minions aren’t just evil, they’re bad, or at least their movie is bad. It’s a children’s movie and I’m an adult, sure. But other kiddie pix work for parents as well as kids, and not just those from Pixar.

Part of the problem is that the villain is more ridiculous than scary and isn’t funny a…

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Ride Along 2
Pretty Bad 66 Points 2016

Kevin Hart mugs strenuously throughout Ride Along 2, but it’s not nearly enough to give the movie comedic lift. Indeed, there’s only one other comic actor in the cast with him and that’s Ken Jeong, who is more annoying than funny. Everyone else is a straight man, which means the movie simply is…

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Wrath of the Ti...
Bad 66 Points 2012

Was this sequel really necessary? It lacks a catchphrase and apparently failed to cover its cost.

To Hades with it!

How does anyone even get caught watching a piece-o-crap like this? Two words: airplane movie.

Fortunately I have a low standard when it comes to spam-in-a-can entertainme…

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WikChip Image Holy Hades this gig pays a lot!
2 Replies
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The Twilight Sa...
None Yet 0 Points 2012
The Smurfs 2
None Yet 0 Points 2013
How to Train Yo...
None Yet 0 Points 2014
Think Like a Ma...
None Yet 0 Points 2014